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LETTER 112（第1页）

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LETTER112

MARYLAMBTOSARAHSTODDART

[Datedatend:September21，1803.]

MydearSarah，Ireturnedhomefrommyvisityesterday，andwasmuchpleasedtofindyourletter;forIhavebeenveryanxioustohearhowyouaregoingon.IcouldhardlyhelpexpectingtoseeyouwhenIcamein;yet，thoughIshouldhaverejoicedtohaveseenyourmerryfaceagain，Ibelieveitwasbetterasitwas—uponthewhole;and，allthingsconsidered，itiscertainlybetteryoushouldgotoMalta.ThetermsyouareuponwithyourLoverdoes（asyousayitwill）appearwondrousstrangetome;however，asIcannotenterintoyourfeelings，Icertainlycanhavenothingtosaytoit，onlythatIsincerelywishyouhappyinyourownway，howeveroddthatwaymayappeartometobe.IwouldbeginnowtoadviseyoutodropallcorrespondencewithWilliam;but，asIsaidbefore，asIcannotenterintoyourfeelingsandviewsofthings，yourwaysnotbeingmyways，whyshouldItellyouwhatIwoulddoinyoursituation?So，child，takethyownways，andGodprospertheeinthem!

Onethingmyadvisingspiritmustsay—useaslittleSecrecyaspossible;and，asmuchaspossible，makeafriendofyoursister-in-law—youknowIwasnotstruckwithheratfirstsight;but，uponyouraccount，Ihavewatchedandmarkedherveryattentively;and，whileshewaseatingabitofcoldmuttoninourkitchen，wehadaseriousconversation.Fromthefranknessofhermanner，IamconvincedsheisapersonIcouldmakeafriendof;whyshouldnotyou?Wetalkedfreelyaboutyou:sheseemstohaveajustnotionofyourcharacter，andwillbefondofyou，ifyouwilllether.

Myfatherhadasisterlivedwithus—ofcourse，livedwithmyMother，hersister-in-law;theywere，intheirdifferentways，thebestcreaturesintheworld—buttheysetoutwrongatfirst.Theymadeeachothermiserableforfulltwentyyearsoftheirlives—myMotherwasaperfectgentlewoman，myAuntyasunlikeagentlewomanasyoucanpossiblyimagineagoodoldwomantobe;sothatmydearMother（who，thoughyoudonotknowit，isalwaysinmypoorheadandheart）usedtodistressandwearyherwithincessantandunceasingattentionandpoliteness，togainheraffection.Theoldwomancouldnotreturnthisinkind，anddidnotknowwhattomakeofit—thoughtitalldeceit，andusedtohatemyMotherwithabitterhatred;which，ofcourse，wassoonreturnedwithinterest.Alittlefrankness，andlookingintoeachotherscharactersatfirst，wouldhavesparedallthis，andtheywouldhavelived，astheydied，fondofeachotherforthelastfewyearsoftheirlife.Whenwegrewup，andharmonisedthemalittle，theysincerelylovedeachother.

MyAuntandmyMotherwerewhollyunlikeyouandyoursister，yetinsomedegreetheirsisthesecrethistoryIbelieveofallsisters-in-law—andyouwillsmilewhenItellyouIthinkmyselftheonlywomanintheworldwhocouldlivewithabrotherswife，andmakearealfriendofher，partlyfromearlyobservationoftheunhappyexampleIhavejustgivenyou，andpartlyfromaknackIknowIhaveoflookingintopeoplesrealcharacters，andneverexpectingthemtoactoutofit—neverexpectinganothertodoasIwouldinthesamecase.WhenyouleaveyourMother，andsay，ifyounevershallseeheragain，youshallfeelnoremorse，andwhenyoumakeajewishbargainwithyourLover，allthisgivesmenooffence，becauseitisyournature，andyourtemper，andIdonotexpectorwantyoutobeotherwisethanyouare.Iloveyouforthegoodthatisinyou，andlookfornochange.But，certainly，yououghttostrugglewiththeevilthatdoesmosteasilybesetyou—atotalwantofpolitenessinbehaviour，Iwouldsaymodestyofbehaviour，butthatIshouldnotconveytoyoumyideaofthewordmodesty;forIcertainlydonotmeanthatyouwantrealmodesty;andwhatisusuallycalledfalse，ormock，modestyis[aquality]Icertainlydonotwishyoutopossess;yetItrustyouknowwhatImeanwellenough.

Secrecy，thoughyouappearallfrankness，iscertainlyagrandfailingofyours;itislikewiseyourbrothers，and，therefore，afamilyfailing—bysecrecy，Imeanyoubothwantthehabitoftellingeachotheratthemomenteverythingthathappens—whereyougo，—andwhatyoudo，—thefreemunicationoflettersandopinionsjustastheyarrive，asCharlesandIdo，—andwhichis，afterall，theonlygroundworkoffriendship.Yourbrother，Iwillanswerfor[it，]willnevertellhiswifeorhissisterallthat[isin]hismind—hewillreceiveletters，andnot[mentionit].ThisisafaultMrs.Stoddartcannever[tellhimof;]butshecan，andwill，feelit:though，[on]thewhole，andineveryotherrespect，sheis[very]happywithhiBegin，forGodssake，atthefirst，andtellhereverythingthatpasses.Atfirstshemayhearyouwithindifference;butintimethiswillgainheraffectionandconfidence;showherallyourletters（nomatterifshedoesnotshowhers）—itisapleasantthingforafriendtoputintooneshandaletterjustfreshfromthepost.Iwouldevensay，beginwithshowingherthis，butthatitiswrittenfreelyandloosely，andsomeapologyoughttobemadeforit—whichIknownothowtomake，forImustwritefreelyornotatall.

Ifyoudothis，shewilltellyourbrother，youwillsay;andwhatthen，"ha?Itwillbegetafreermunicationamongstyou，whichisathingdevoutlytobewished—

Godblessyou，andgrantyoumaypreserveyourintegrity，andremainunmarriedandpenniless，andmakeWilliamagoodandahappywife.

Youraffectionatefriend，

M.LAMB.

Charlesisveryunwell，andmyheadaches.Hesendshislove:mine，withmybestwishes，toyourbrotherandsister.

IhopeIshallgetanotherletterfromyou.

Wednesday，21stSeptember，1803.

[SarahStoddartwasthesisterofDr.JohnStoddart，whohadjustbeenappointedtheKingsandtheAdmiraltysAdvocateatMalta，whitherMissStoddartfollowedhiHerloverofthatmomentwasaMr.Turner，andWilliamwasanearlierloverstill.Hersister-in-lawwasMrs.JohnStoddart，néeIsabellaMoncrieff，whomherbrotherhadonlyjustmarried.

"MyMother."ThisistheonlyreferencetohermotherinanyofMary

Lambsletters.ThesisterwasSarahLamb，usuallyknownasAuntHetty.]

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